The musings of a final year medical student

Wednesday, 5 February 2014

update: anaesthesia

Last week I had all my wisdom teeth out in preparation for my orthagnathic (double jaw) surgery in the Summer holidays. The surgery went fine with only a minor complication, but for the past week things haven't been rosy.

Since being more open with my depression and making the previous blogpost, I have felt very good emotionally. But physically, it hasn't been too good. So far I'm still eating a mostly liquid and some soft food diet as I can't properly open my mouth and am afraid of disturbing the stitches in my gums. The cravings have been bizarre and immense. Yesterday, I went back to sixth form, but it didn't go to well. I stuck through the 4 hours of lessons that I had that day, but my concentration was awful, I didn't take much in and I felt completely exhausted. I suppose for the past 6 days or so I've been used to sitting for hours in one attitude and not having to actually use my brain, other than for making food and watching TV. I tried to do some revision on Sunday and it completely drained me. When I got back from sixth form, I tried to stay awake but failed miserably, hitting the hay at 5.45pm and skipping dinner.  My mouth and head were both incredibly sore. I woke up at 9.30am this morning with 30 minutes till I had to leave for sixth form, feeling just as shit as I did when I went to bed and worrying if I was safe enough to drive. So I decided not to go in for the 90 minute lesson I was supposed to have, plus revision session and SU meeting.

I don't really know what the exact cause of this is, but I'm putting it down to the general anaesthetic. I wasn't actually under for that long, but longer nonetheless that was anticipated; it was for around 2 hours. Not very long. But I don't know why else I'm having such severe physical symptoms. Some of the tiredness will definitely stem from the fact that I'm just not eating enough; it's really hard to get enough nutrient-dense calories when you're living off canned soups and children's sized portions of spaghetti hoops, plus a heck of a lot of yoghurt and chocolate mousse. This does worry me because when I have the double jaw surgery I'll be on the liquid diet for a good 6-8 weeks and I don't want to waste away.

I'm finding all this incredibly frustrating because mentally I am so optimistic and motivated to move on with my life. I want to do revision, I want to start playing piano on a daily basis again. I have never wanted to go running in the abysmal English weather more in my entire life. I want to go clubbing, to the gym and hiking with my friends and go to coffee shops. I really want to through myself back into my studies. But my body is holding me back from doing all these things.

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