The musings of a fourth year English medical student

Sunday, 13 November 2016

OVERWHELMED



As the title suggests, the past few weeks have been pretty intense! I have finished my psychiatry placement and have had a week of cardiovascular lectures. Having said that, I couldn't tell you anything about said topic. I've been running around helping with events, doing my research project and marking essays. I haven't actually sat down and done any revision at all this week, because every time I try to I either fall asleep or get a headache. I feel bad for complaining about my workload given that many people juggle more balls than I do. Medicine never relents and only gets busier and busier, and you are expected to evolve. I love this challenge, but some days I can't stand it. Some days I want to lie in bed and not feel a sense of dread of all the deadlines looming in the air; all the knowledge I know I require but do not have yet to pass my exams. 

On top of that, the US presidential elections happened, and I am trying to decide which hospital to station myself at next year. For us at Liverpool, we do our finals in fourth year, not fifth year. You spend the vast majority of time at your 'base' hospital, pretty much doing 9-5 or 8-4. Therefore, the hospital you choose will be responsible for teaching your core finals knowledge, and getting your practical skills up to scratch in order to pass the LOCAS (Liverpool Objective Clinical Assessment System) exams. Some of the best teaching hospitals are the furthest away from where I live, and so it is a massive decision to weigh up your quality of education and where you're prepared to live or commute to. Many of us feel like we are choosing universities all over again.

I've also got a job, but am now worried how I'm going to manage with that as well! I am looking for a new car that is a bit cheaper but not succeeding. 

I am very excited for Christmas, as it's my favourite time of year. But again, there's a nagging feeling that exams are that bit closer and a whole term has nearly gone by. I'm trying to keep calm and carry on, but some days I just want to give up. Other days I am utterly in love with medicine and feel so strongly that this is what I am meant to do. I don't think I've ever worked this hard before, but I think it will be worth it. 
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